My main Kabuki, Hiroki Kuroda, who I egregiously did not recall from the DL last week in time for his seven-inning shutout of Houston, tonight recorded a complete-game, one-hit shutout of the Braves. I now need Kuroda and the rest of my starters to throw one-hit shutouts every outing (144 or so) for the remainder of the season to make up for my ERA and WHIP during interleague play.

CeeCee Sabathia arrived in Milwaukee today, meaning that he will be up for open bid in my NL-only league. Good lord, he is going to go for a ton of dough. I expect him to be unbelievable the rest of the season, unless an insomniatic Prince Fielder coaxes him in to some late night trips to Arnold’s.

Just for spits and giggles, I perused Jeff and my preseason baseball preview. I had Brad Hawpe as my #7 NL outfielder and Rickie Weeks ranked ahead of Brandon Phillips at second base… egads. Those picks are still way better than my selection of Troy Tulowitzki as the league’s #4 shortstop.

If anyone was crazy enough to listen to me, that’s what you get for taking advice from a guy who paid $38 for Jacque Jones.